Want To Be Happier? Stop Looking Outside Yourself

"Expecting something outside of you to get better in order for you to make your life work...is something for you to take a hard look at." ~ Dr. Wayne Dyer

Have you ever told yourself you would be happier if you won the lottery, had a better job, lost weight, or found a new love? If so, you're not alone.

People often believe something outside of themselves will make them happier. For some, more money would indeed solve daily challenges such as the ability to pay bills. For others, a change in their weight or work life might boost their mood.

The truth is, external elements bring only temporary happiness. Once you have enough money to pay your bills, have lost weight, or have fallen in love, your happiness subsides and you begin looking for the next external element to make you happy.

When Hollywood director Tom Shadyac began making millions through hit films such as Ace Ventura and Bruce Almighty, he noticed that as he acquired huge mansions and fancy cars, he wasn't any happier. After facing his own death, Tom gained clarity and purpose and gave up most of his material possessions. He documents his journey in the movie, I Am.

Happiness begins within you. Love and appreciate yourself, choose positive thoughts, be grateful for what you have, and make the most of your situation. The things you take for granted everyday...clean water, electricity, clothes...are blessings for someone else.

When you choose to live in this way, you attract more positivity and happiness into your life.

In the words of Buddha, "There is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way."

To Set Yourself Up For Success Ask This Important Question

As you set out to achieve your goals and dreams, you may be asking what you need to do in order to bring them to fruition.

Another important question to ask is, "Who do I need to become to get from where I am to where I want to be?" Who you are is not a matter of what you do for a living. Rather, it is a matter of who you are on the inside.

Here are a few questions to consider (and why to consider them) as you assess who to become:

Am I grateful for what I already have?
Why: Be grateful for what you already have before expecting more.
This also means being grateful for your challenges because they serve a purpose in your life. "If you start focusing on what you have and what you're grateful for, you will begin to see more." ~ Oprah Winfrey

Do I operate from my ego or from humility?
Why: The ego is the source of many of our problems.
As Eckhart Tolle states in his blockbuster book, A New Earth, "Many people don't realize until they are on their deathbed and everything external falls away that no thing ever had anything to do with who they are."

Do I genuinely care about others?
Why: Life is largely about caring for your fellowman.
When you care about others you enrich their lives and ultimately your own. Watch this short, powerful video of a CNN Hero who does exactly that.

Do I choose positive thoughts over negative ones?
Why: Whatever you give your focus and energy to, that is what you attract into your life.
You may not always be able to control what happens to you in life. However, you can choose your attitude.

As you assess who to become to get to where you want to be, consider qualities that will strengthen your character, attract opportunities into your life, and positively set you up to manage the successes (and setbacks) that come your way.

Celebrate Your Successes - You've Earned Them!

“The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate.” ~ Oprah Winfrey

When people hear the word "success," they often think of lofty achievements such as wealth, fame, and the accumulation of material possessions.

We tend to get so caught up in this definition of success that we overlook other achievements in our lives.

When you reflect on your life, you will see you've achieved many successes -- successes you EARNED!

Think back on those moments when you were hired for a new job, raised a family, started a business, performed acts of kindness, chose a healthier lifestyle, or learned a new skill.

In his book, The Success Principles, Jack Canfield cites a management study which reveals that 46% of employees left their company because they felt unappreciated and 88% said they were not acknowledged for their work.

People have an inherent need to be acknowledged and appreciated. Start by acknowledging yourself for your successes.

Create a list of successes you've achieved over your lifetime. The list can be as long or as short as you'd like. This exercise allows you to see success in a different way and helps amplify your self-worth.

Once you've acknowledged your successes, CELEBRATE them; you've earned it!

Are You Making This Routine Mistake With Your Health?

"The greatest wealth is health." ~ Virgil

Failure and mistakes are an important part of growth and success as Denzel Washington noted in his recent commencement speech at the University of Pennsylvania. Watch Video >

Mistakes will best serve you when you learn from them. So what routine mistake do millions of people make every day and how can they learn from it? They fail to take a break throughout their work day and may even work up to 11 hours a day on a regular basis.

A 12-year study of more than 7,000 healthy adults in the United Kingdom shows that people who put in at least 11 hours a day up their risk of a heart attack or dying from heart disease by 67 percent. Read More >

As someone who often spent long hours working in an office, I have learned there is no virtue in allowing the health of my mind and body to take second place.

Now, I take short breaks throughout the day, usually from 5 to 30 minutes. I take a walk, grab a snack, or briefly watch TV.

When you take a break you:

• Feel refreshed and energized
• Think more clearly
• Reduce health risks
• Generate new thoughts and ideas that may lead to problem solving

You will never find the time, you must make the time to give your mind and body the break they deserve. Make (and keep) an appointment with yourself each day to take a break or ask a friend or co-worker to hold you accountable to taking breaks.

As Denzel Washington quipped in his commencement address, "You will never see a U-Haul behind a hearse." In other words you can't take it with you, so make time for you.

___________________________
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A Real Leader Saves Children from a Trash Dump

Not only is Elena Durón Miranda a CNN Hero, she is a leader of character. Durón Miranda learned that many children in Bariloche, a popular city for skiers and tourists in southern Argentina, drop out of school and spend their lives working at a trash dump.

She then launched an organization to provide them with free education and extracurricular programs so they have an alternative to working.

Fathers as Leaders and Teachers

From the moment children are born, their families bear the responsibility of teaching them the skills, values, and beliefs, which help shape their characters.

One of the primary teachers and strongest influences on a child is his/her father.

Being able to influence a child with positive values and beliefs is a precious gift to a father.

Recognizing this gift and using it effectively means a father is aware he is a leader with the power and responsibility to shape other leaders.

Fathers (and mothers) as leaders in the home is embodied in these words from bestselling author, Stephen Covey:

For parents to instill a sense of vision and possibility into a family, to exercise the discipline and sacrifice to pull that vision off, and to endure through the difficult times with a deep sense of passion, drive, and commitment, all in a conscience-driven way, I suggest is the ultimate and best test of leadership. (From the book, The 8th Habit: From Effectiveness to Greatness.)

The world will forever benefit from leaders of character, and fathers can help develop such leaders by exemplifying positive leadership behaviors.

A Father's Love is Sometimes Unspoken: An Unforgettable Discovery of Truth

Like some dads, my father did not express his emotions often.

Thirty years after his passing, I continued to believe he may not have loved me very much. That is, until one day when I had an unforgettable experience.

Three years ago, while attending a personal development course, the trainer instructed the group to get into pairs and complete an exercise on appreciating and understanding our parents.

As it turned out, the man I had partnered with was an educated, intelligent young man from the Caribbean—just like my dad. The instructor turned down the lights, and I closed my eyes and began speaking with my partner as if he were my father.

The words that came out of my mouth went something like, “You were always so strict with us and I feel you never really loved me.”

With my eyes still closed, I heard this loving and peaceful reply assuring me I was loved. “You see,” said the voice, “I was raised to be a strong man. That was my way. I wanted you to be strong. I wanted the best for you.”

I heard what seemed to be my father’s voice, continuing to speak with me and putting to rest the doubts I had carried for so long.

Within minutes, tears were streaming down my face because not only did I understand; I also felt that in some way my father was at peace for finally sharing these thoughts with me.

On this Father’s Day, enjoy this inspiring video, in which the true story of Dick Hoyt and his son Rick unfold. As you watch, know that although your father may not express his love for you by running marathons, he loves you in his own way.

___________________________
Visit Christine Ferguson at:
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